I think missing you hurts the most when something funny happens. Because in that one moment I find myself laughing, and within the next second I want to tell or text you what happened. And then it hits me again, every single time, that you aren’t there anymore. That I lost that one thing that mattered to me. And there's not a day that goes by, without me thinking of you, dying, in someone else's arms. I really can't imagine that. You know what? I’m awful about your name. I still jump when I hear it. I still feel it rattling somewhere in my stomach. I think I’m jealous of anyone that gets to say it because it’s not my right anymore. I came to realized that you already left me. Left me alone. And I can't stop myself for missing you. I keep dreaming of you, everyday. Those dreams are so vivid, I feel like you're really besides me, hold my hands and kiss me. And when I wake up, I'll keep missing you all over again.
